Sunday, January 23, 2011

Des rangila rangila, des mera rangila... (A year later)

A year later, it's back to square one. Almost.

A year ago I posted this and it seems strange that a year later I more or less feel the same. The only difference? People have changed. No. They're dead actually. Places have changed. I'm no longer lost and lonely in London. And Bombay? My jaan? Still a stranger to the city I once called home.

The loneliness, the insecurities, the self-doubts. A little less, a little more. I stopped being the centre of someone else's universe a long time ago. Maybe I never was. No. I don't believe that. In another time, another life, it'll be all mine for the taking. Perhaps it's time I made myself the centre of my universe. Would that be wrong?

And happiness. Yes, yes. Here I go again. The pursuit of happiness. The pursuit continues...

I guess I'm still that ordinary guy with extraordinary dreams. I wanted it all. I still want it all. Funny thing is I don't know what I want. A smile to wake up to. A hug to hold on to. Eyes that look into mine and tell me how much I mean to them. Money too. Yes. Why not?

Funnily, it's 3 am now. Again I'm rambling.

A year later, des rangila rangila, des mera rangila...
Memories of yesterday
The inheritance of loss
Dream on, heart's desire
A hug, a smile
Sealed with a kiss
My destiny awaits
Or what I make of it
Bombay, London
London, Bombay
It's here I loved
It's here I lost
All in one lifetime

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